DEPRESSION | Yeah, Yeah, But I’m Hosting a $$ Giveaway!

by Lisa Alber

Commercial Interruption

So much new stuff this week. A book cover! As seen on my newly redesigned website HERE! To celebrate, I’m raffling off a $50 Amazon e-gift certificate. Starting tomorrow, over the next week, you can enter the giveaway by going to my blog HERE and leaving a comment.

Back to the Main Attraction: 5 Debut Authors. 5 Novels. One Big Dance Toward Publication — Please No Depression

This week is launch week at the Class of 2014 debut(ante) author blog, The Debutante Ball. I’m honored to be one of five authors who will be blogging for the next year. I’m a little nervous too. When you think debutante, what do you imagine? I picture fresh-faced young women waltzing their joyous ways into the next stage of life. All is light and bright and ideal. I’ve been invited to be an authorial version of a debutante. I’m not scared because of the work involved with the group blog. I can handle that. What lurks, ever present in the deep recesses of my brain, is depression. I live with uneasiness that the switch is going to flip, and I’m going to fall into a dark mood that could last for weeks. The lurking grayness is always with me, even now, when things are going well.

Folks who don’t suffer from depression don’t understand how the chronic uneasiness can taint your worldview. Call it the Eeyore Syndrome. This isn’t to say I don’t think optimistically and have faith in the good. I’m not a dour person, but I struggle to remain upbeat, to set aside the uneasiness, to remember to be grateful and bring myself back to the moment. It takes a lot of brain energy, and I often get very, very tired and have to retreat from the world (and this is when I’m NOT depressed).

Over at The Debutante Ball all is upbeat because we’re five debut authors blogging about our journeys toward publication. Amidst this fun, my darkness lurks. What’ll happen if I fall into a depression? Will I be able to blog at all, much less with metaphorical tiara and pearls in place? If I sink into the abyss, will I have the guts to be honest about it over there, which will mean straying off the week’s designated topic?

I suppose I will, because I have a hard time faking it. It just makes me uneasy is all, mostly because the abyss is out of my control. I can hope, and I can do what I need to do for my best mental and physical health, but when the caul falls, it falls.

Funny thing is, here on ShadowSpinners, I don’t worry about it. The name of this group blog says it all. I can be as dark as I need to be. But hopefully I won’t need to be.

2 thoughts on “DEPRESSION | Yeah, Yeah, But I’m Hosting a $$ Giveaway!

  1. Hi there. Debs on the dark side. This is something I struggle with, too. My anxiety, which brings depression on its evil heels, has been in overdrive lately, I think because of all of the “firsts.” Excitement brings with it possibility, but also intense fear of the unknown, or the realization that it could all come crashing down at any moment. And then there’s the fact that winter is coming (do I sound like GAME OF THRONES?). Here in the midwest, it lasts for 6 months. Blerg. Anyway, just wanted to let you know that you’re not alone. It’s our party and we’ll cry if we want to.

    • Hi Susan. I appreciate your response so much. Anxiety is a bitch–and I’m sorry you’ve been feeling it lately. (Yeesh, hopefully not caused primarliy by Deb website stuff?) “Firsts,” not matter how great, cause stress, that’s for sure. I’ve been overly amped up lately too…which means I might be in for a fall. 😦

      Exactly, it’s our party!

      I love GAME OF THRONES — winter IS coming. Starting about October I won’t see much sun until next June.

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